As she proceeded into her month of training she learned that To Shin Do wasn’t a showy martial art like many others she had hear of, and that my brother was currently enrolled in, and I had been involved in.  She learned that they taught how to defend yourself in real life situations.  She enjoyed her free month of training so much that she thought it would be a good experience for all of us to join and took my brother out of the other martial art and enrolled us all (my father, brother and myself) in To Shin Do.  At first I wasn’t eager, but my mom convinced me.

This martial art was different than anything I had ever taken or experienced before.  When I took Tae Kwon Do we were told we had to look good and synchronized together at the right time.  I never knew that alignment and body weight were effective.  I soon began to really enjoy the training.

Along my journey to black belt there were many times I could have walked out and not returned as I felt I didn’t always belong and that I couldn’t understand the material that we were required to learn.  What I didn’t realize at the time was that “I” was creating that experience and it was because I was not willing to learn, and that I was being lazy about learning.

Looking back on my training I can see how far I have come and that this is a great accomplishment.  I have learnt so much more than self-defense.

I had no idea what to expect during my orientation lesson, but everyone was very helpful and made me feel at ease.  In my first class I learned an amazing technique.   From a grounded body position and an understanding of the body structure I could cause tremendous pain to an attacker with only a slight movement.  This art did not require speed or athleticism.  It required intelligence. This was the art for me.  During my first few months as a white belt I learned useful techniques I could use if I were physically threatened in a parking lot or walking down the street. I often worked late at night and travelled for business, so knowing some self-defense techniques brought some comfort.  I enjoyed the training so much that I got my husband and children involved not long after I started.  It has been a fun family bonding experience.

Over the last four years I’ve learned a great deal of self-defense, and so much more.  The most important things I’ve learned are mental, not necessarily physical. I’ve learned that there is so much more to respect:  a respect for myself and my body and that everyone has something to teach; to be patient and understanding; and to be strong enough to show this respect to others.  Mental and spiritual balance are other aspects of the training that I now better understand. To be balanced in all aspects of my life – work, home, use of my talents.

Finally, I learned that you don’t know your limits until you try.  Who would have thought that a 45 year old, out of shape, busy working-mother of two would obtain the rank of black belt?  I didn’t think so until I tried.  I learned that my body was a thing of power and can be used to defend myself against attackers who are larger, stronger, and faster than me.  If I can do this, what else might I be able to do?

Although he wanted nothing more to do with “karate” I knew I had to find a place that could help him learn to defend himself.  I spoke to a number of martial arts centers in the area, explained my son’s situation and asked about their self-defense classes.  It was always the same response.  They didn’t have a class that strictly taught self-defense, but he would gain confidence and come to learn self-defense through classes in whichever martial art form they were teaching. 

So I went to Quest Martial Arts.  As we discussed our needs I soon realized we were on the same page.  They were exactly what I was looking for.  Instead of teaching self-defense through a martial arts form, Quest teaches their martial art form through self-defense techniques.  They told me that my son would walk away from the very first class with techniques he could use.  I had nothing to lose as the first month was free.  I only had to drag my son to the first class.  Not only were we amazed at how differently Quest conducted their class, but how well their instructors taught and interacted with the students. I also noticed how helpful their students were with each other.  No exaggerations.  In an extremely comfortable environment, in that very first class, my son actually did learn self-defense techniques that he could use immediately.  Now my son truly looks forward to going to class, he has found a place where he can relieve his stress.  He wants to be more involved and become a leader, and let’s not forget the main reason he started – he learns and practices real life self-defense.

Walking into the Dojo, I felt a sense of peace and strength.  I realized that my opportunity to change the direction of my life was in front of me.  Initially, I felt a little lost as I had been used to using strength, and this was a far cry from the boxing I did in the military.  However, I had always enjoyed a challenge and I was determined to get through one class and then another.  My perseverance paid off and I slowly learned that the key was to manipulate balance through control and technique.  I began to love the way I felt both mentally and physically after completing each class. I was benefitting from the top-notch instruction.  I started meeting more people and felt more comfortable and there was camaraderie among the students that I realized I had been missing in my life.

Now, 4 ½ years later I am about to achieve my Black Belt.  There have been personal challenges along the way and nights when I was tired and did not want to go to class, but I persevered through those times, made myself go to class and pushed through.  Now, at the doorstep of achieving my Black Belt I am very proud of myself and my accomplishment.   Goals and goal setting are now an important part of my life.

It is truly an honor and a privilege to study and be under the instruction of some of the best To Shin Do masters in the world.

A Quest Martial Arts flyer found its way to our home and I followed up with a drive by the dojo one Sunday afternoon.   I was intrigued by the concept of a modernized, no-nonsense style.  An introductory lesson followed, and insecurity issues aside, we signed up.

The training experience has been remarkable for many reasons and I have gained many insights into martial arts training from my experience at the Quest Center.  First of all the dojo has a completely different “vibe” than what I had experienced in the past. I was not used to the “cooperative” training.  The instructors had an answer for any question I posed, and importantly, the answers made sense.  The katas were practical. I didn’t need to leave the ground any more to attempt a spinning hook kick to the head!  I could actually improve as I aged by becoming more efficient rather than more athletic or more flexible.

An unexpected benefit of To Shin Do training was the focus on life skills and meditation.  It never ceases to amaze me how useful many of the lessons I learned about effective communication, diffusing hostility, and understanding others intent, body language, posturing, etc. are in my everyday life.

Perhaps my favorite part of the training has been the fact that it has been, and will remain, a family affair.  Our family has grown together as part of the Quest family.   I look back fondly on my foundational training in To Shin Do and I look forward to lifetime of progress in the art.

I signed up and the more I became involved in my initial training the more I was sure that I was going in the right direction.  I wanted to be challenged and I wanted to see how far I could progress.  There were times during my training when I thought I would give up.  The training was more challenging and I wasn’t sure I could continue.  I gave those times some hard thought and each time I knew I just needed to go back, give more effort and persevere.  I made the right decision each time.

Now, having achieved my black belt I have learned how to be more focused, in control and how to persevere with confidence in the face of challenge.  These three factors can determine success in and out of the dojo, at home and at work.

The more time I spend at Quest Martial Arts the more convinced I am that this is a very positive and worthwhile path in my life.

I can honestly say that I never expected to earn a Black Belt.  At the time I joined I had no idea what I was getting into – I just wanted to spend time with my family in an activity that we could all enjoy together.  I had no expectations of what I was going to learn or how much these lessons would influence my life.  The training (life skills in particular) has given me tools with which to deal with certain challenges in life and have helped me to realize that I am a strong person, inside and out. I have been on a Fudo Shin retreat conducted by Master Russo, which was a tremendous three days of life skills and personal development.  I have found support and friendship at Quest Martial Arts. The people are an amazing group and with their support I know I can grow even more.

Due to my small stature I find the art of To Shin Do attractive because you do not have to rely on strength in order to be effective in a self-defense situation.  When I began training I believed the physical training was going to be the focus, but I realize that the life skills have been much more valuable to me in gaining a stronger respect for myself and my environment, a higher level of integrity and a solid belief in my abilities/confidence.  I have memories of making life-changing decisions while sitting on the mat in the dojo during life skills sessions.  The training, environment and influence of the instructors and students have helped me to face and overcome some serious obstacles in my life.  I am thankful to have had this influence in my life at a time when I needed it the most.

There are three important things I have gained over my four years of training toward black belt.  First of all, my self-esteem and confidence have greatly improved.  I still catch myself laughing about how I was when I first put on my white belt.  Second, the training has helped with my overall physical abilities and kept me wanting to stay in shape so that I could be better and more effective with my martial art skills.  The positive atmosphere coupled with the stress relief I found in the training finally allowed me an outlet to blow off steam and relax.  Third, being given the opportunity to prove to myself that I can achieve the goals that I have set before me.
Finally, training at Quest Martial Arts has meant more to me than anyone will ever know – I love it!

In the years that have passed since that day I have learned things that I know I could not have found anywhere else.  This martial art is so much more than the mainstream martial arts.  This art does not have competition or high-flying kicks and athleticism, it is something anyone can do without having to be faster or stronger.  This art can be adapted to work for anyone.

Aside from the martial art, self-defense training I found the life skills opened up a door that I did not know was closed. Thinking about what we say, how we say it, how we act around each other is important and not something they teach in school, or easily found.  Most importantly though is thinking about myself and how I “see” things.  Looking inward, analyzing what and how I do things will always be a challenge, one that I will not be shying away from.  I honestly do not know where I would have been without these teachings. They have helped me tremendously in my life.

The main thing that made Quest Martial Arts so great were my fellow students and the instructors.  Experiencing the training and the life skills would not have been as enjoyable and enlightening without the like-minded, forward thinking people there.  I am amazed to this day that Quest Martial Arts attracts and retains the pool of people that it does from manual workers and office staff, to high-ranking lawyers and surgeons. I feel that we are all an extended family and that has made a world of difference.  For what has been created at Quest Martial Arts and sustained for so many years saying “Thank You” does not seem enough. Thank You.